MSC Magazine | Issue 4 | Summer 2020

Page 26| Missionaries of the Sacred Heart I remember last time I wrote to you in the ST THOMAS THE APOS- TLE CATHOLIC CHURCH maga- zine was when we were in the first wave of the coronavirus and in the first lockdown. This time I am writing to you, we are in the second wave and the second lockdown. I do not know about you, but I find this second lockdown is harder, not physically since I have got used to regulate my day at home, but mentally. I find my sense of anxiety has height- ened, my feelings and emotions have become a bit more in- tense. One thing I realise is that I am missing being with people, with you all, just having a chat, sharing and listening to what is going on, looking at your face and seeing the happiness and sadness in people’s hearts. Not being able to experience this at this time leaves a hole in my heart and part of myself trying to fill it with defensive aggression and egoistic anger from time to time. In recent times, the media has been talking a lot about mental health of people enduring the restrictive lifestyle of the pan- demic. I think it is worthwhile and vitally important for us all to be aware of our mental states – whether anxiety, hopelessness, powerlessness, contentment, joy or peace – we all need to at- tend to this as part of our every- day activity. We need to regu- late our feelings and emotions – letting them surface and be as they are, finding the messages they want to convey, the deep- er meaning about our deeper selves, nourishing our life-giving emotions and integrating the emotions that are driving us to despair and darkness rather than hope and light. During this time, quite a few spir- itual writers have observed that this is an opportunity for us all to become conscious of who we really are without fanfare, public attention and recognition, dis- tractions from our busy lives, tu- multuousness of everyday life, or our public duties and services which are wonderfully good in themselves but can also be a boost injection to our ego and ambitious giant. Who are we when all these things suddenly disappear? Are we still beloved of God? Are we still feeling and experiencing this love from God regardless of our deflated ego screaming at us? Recently I read an article from Andrew Hamilton SJ. In the arti- cle, he reflected on the two feasts that mark the month like the two hands holding the sa- cred body of Christ: the feast of St Mary of the Cross McKillop and the feast of the Assumption of Mary. St Mary of the Cross is obviously celebrated gloriously every year as she is our first ever Australian canonised saint. But her light FR KHOI NGUYEN msc Reflection : Lockdown Phase 2